Sildras does miss his mother. Every now and again he will ask when he will see his Alma. I keep reminding him that she is ver,y very busy with her new appointment to the temple. She has been granted holidays, however, so I remind him that we will see her next for the old life and new life festivals. We will be joining her for dinner within her confinement inside the temple, though for the occasion it will be in a decent sort of room, not merely her one room cell.
I expect there will be quite the guard in attendance. I have heard little of her condition, but the less I hear of her, the less likely I am to send a message to my friend in a certain group a message and then prepare how to comfort my son over Urtisa’s sudden passing.
I do not think Sildras understands much of what happened. He knows that his mother lied and that I wasn’t really sick, even though I was there sick. I am not sure if he really understands what the situation with the imposter was, just that it was a Mer that looked like me who was sick that Urtisa was calling me.
I am sure it is far too painful for a child at that age to let themselves know that the person raising them had been hurting them and those around them so badly. He seems to be contented to focus on the present.
Honestly, I fear what will happen when we see Urtisa for the holiday. She still holds a lot of sway over Sildras. It would break my heart if she did something to hurt him or convince him to do something that hurts someone else and he would blame himself later for. Not to mention it is hard for me to control my rage at her actions.
When Sildras is older, I shall attempt to explain things to him again. I want him to know that he has always been loved though. By his grandparents, by my brothers, by me. That no matter what may have happened, he still has family that loves him more than anything else in this life.