2nd of Sun’s Height

Again I was plagued by the pains of my past in the form of twisted nightmares. This time I dreamt that Altmer troops came to our camp and demanded that I be handed over. Qau-dar pointed at my tent and told them to do as they pleased. I tried to run, but my foot was tied to the tent post. I reached for my blades, but they were gone. I tried to use my flames, but none would come.

The Altmeri solders tied me to the ground and stick needles of ice and flame heated daggers into my skin. They flayed my arms and poked at the nerves with their dirty fingers, laughing at how it made me twitch. They poured poisons in the wounds to watch me writhe in pain. Always healing me before the wounds could prove mortal.

I could hear Speaks-Too-Soon asking about what all the commotion was and Qau-dar telling her I just had guests visiting and not to disturb the activities.

They slit Tel’s throat and made me watch as the life drained out of him. They gave him just enough healing to prolong his suffering a long, long time. Laughing at my anguish. Then they went back to their tortures.

I awoke just as they were telling me that I was going to be sold as a slave to the Altmeri army to be their personal play toy. I would be used and passed around as they saw fit and killed when I outlived my uses.

When I opened my eyes I smelt burnt fabric. I had scorched my sleeping roll and some of the ground cloth. I will need to replace the ground cloth at the next town, I have ruined the ability for this area to keep out the elements and those tent repairs never work fully.

I could not find the appetite to eat breakfast. I tried. I ate a bite of apple cake. It made me feel like I might throw it right back up. I gave the rest of it to Tel. Then I packed up my things and awaited the others.

Qau-dar has been avoiding me even more since yesterday. I am trying to be as out of the way as possible now. Perhaps it is best if I give him more space. I shall ride a pace behind instead of together with him and Speaks-Too-Soon today. Perhaps that will put him in a better humor. I will even set my tent up further away while he still is so angry.

Azura, tonight I shall pray to you again. At the proper time with the proper offerings. I beg you for your guidance.

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